Nothing Really Makes Sense Anymore
by TwirlsWrites
Summary: On a routine case, Sam and Dean run into a girl who's a little too familiar for their tastes. pre Sabriel, hinted at Destiel, kind of meta, kind of genderbending, kind of crack. Happy Sabriel Week day 1!


"I don't know, Dean, I don't think there's anything particularly supernatural about this," Sam hissed to his brother as the two walked idly around the first floor of the college building they were in, "nobody even died."

"Sammy – that's the point. Guy falls off of the top of a four-story building and is fine?" Dean replied, not looking perturbed at all by his brother's irritation. "Besides, it wasn't like this was out of our way." They had been on their way up to visit Bobby and he'd told them to stop by and take a look. Somewhere nearby a few doors opened up and the sound of feet and voices filled up the hall. Dean smacked Sam lightly, "stay fresh."

Sam shot Dean a glare, but picked up the camera from around his neck and started shooting random shots of the building. They were masquerading this week as reporters, covering the incident.

Dean surveyed the passing students idly, trying to look casual. Some gave them strange looks, but nobody lept out at them with black eyes and a knife, so Dean counted it as a win. After a couple of minutes, the crowd dissipated, assumedly to go to their next classes. He felt a body collide into his back.

"Oh shi- sorry!" a voice from behind him rang out. He turned, it was a girl with blue eyes and dark blond hair sitting on the ground, looking embarrassed.

"It's okay, where you running off to?"

"Lunch," she said. She started gathering her belongings, which had dropped same time as her. Sam knelt down to look, and noted a library copy of one of the _Supernatural_ books – oh God, they were in libraries now? – Among the fallen books. Apparently, she noticed his look, "I don't read those!" she exclaimed, snatching it from his hands, "I was returning it to the library for my friend." She stood.

"You sound a might defensive," Dean said with a smirk. She glowered at him, but then apparently noticed Sam's camera.

"What are you doing?" she asked, head tilted to the side.

"We're reporters," Sam said.

"Oh! Is this about Tate falling off the building last week?" she asked, "isn't that kind of old news."

"We like to cover everything," Sam said. He turned his camera on her and took a shot, earning a strange look from Dean and a blush from the girl.

"Right. You know he's fine?" she pointed out, "I guess karma missed a step."

"Karma?" Dean asked. The girl blinked, apparently she hadn't meant to say that.

"Oh… yeah, well, Tate's kind of a douchebag," she said hesitantly.

"Well, his name is Tate," Dean snorted.

"Dude, I know right?" she said, her eyes wide.

"Why was he a douchbag…?" Sam asked.

"Ellie," she filled in. "He's just your classic frat jerk." She shrugged, "one of the hazing tricks they always did was shoving freshmen off of the deck at their house. Last week my roommate's brother broke his arm." She rolled her eyes, "idiot."

"Ironic," Sam muttered. He caught Dean's eye, and the older Winchester raised an eyebrow as if to say _'see?'_

"Yeah," she shrugged, "can you… not quote me on that, though? That came out a lot meaner than I meant it to."

"Sure," Dean said, "maybe we'll go talk to Tate in the hospital."

"He's back at his apartment already, actually," she said. She fumbled for a pen and scribbled the address on Sam's wrist. "I know because he and his merry band of buffoons threw a party to celebrate last night… they live above me." She put the pen back into her bag. "Anyway, I have to go to lunch now, so… good luck?" with a parting grin – aimed more at Sam than Dean – she turned and left the building.

"She was cute," Sam said. Dean smirked.

"She's probably way to young for you, dude."

"Cas is a billion years older than you," Sam pointed out, looking at his wrist.

"What does that have to do with anything?" Dean asked.

"Nothing," Sam said with a roll of his eyes, "I guess we should find out where this apartment is." Dean peered at the scribble on his brother's wrist.

"Dude – she gave you her number."

"That's…" Sam trailed off, "she did."

"You should call her," Dean said.

"Whatever," Sam muttered. "Let's go look at the roof," and then the two least discrete men in existence made their way up the stairs.

"Looks normal," Dean said. "What happened?"

"A drunken dare, probably," Sam said. He crinkled his nose as he poked around, "nothing too sinister."

"Aww Sammy, were you in a frat?" Dean said with a smirk. Sam ignored him.

"There's nothing here at all," he said.

"What did you expect; A giant map with directions?" Dean said with a snort. There was a pause, "you were looking for candy wrappers, weren't you? Sam…"

"Okay Dean, shut-up." Sam said, "I wasn't. It's not really the Trickster style – the guy didn't die."

"Yeah, and he's toast," Dean pointed out.

"And that," Sam agreed. He pulled out his iphone.

"Calling the chick?" Dean asked.

"Mapquesting the apartment," Sam replied.

* * *

><p>Talking to Tate didn't turn out to be too helpful. He was very polite, and told the story of what had happened as best he could – he and his brothers had been drunkenly celebrating the end of spring break when he had slipped on something and gone tumbling over the roof of the building.<p>

He was not hung over, as he had decided to go sober after nearly dying, but the other people strewn across the room were. Sam took a few pictures of Tate, for the cover, and noticed a figure in the corner picking some stuff up. There was a cast on one arm.

"What happened to your arm?" Sam asked, picking up a few of the cans the kid was gathering. The kid eyed him suspiciously.

"It's a mark of honor to show that I faced my initiation with courage," he drawled.

"Isn't hazing against the rules?" Sam asked. The kid glared, shoving the cans into his trashbag with a bit too much force.

"It wasn't hazing. It was an accident. I was just too clumsy."

"Right," Sam said. The kid glared again, and then fished a piece of gum from his pocket, popping it into his mouth.

" What are you even talking to me for? I wasn't there."

"Just checking on your arm," Sam said. "Have a great day," he backed up, "brat," he muttered.

"I don't know man, maybe you were right – some kid just fell off the building and it was just some sort of miracle that he wasn't killed," Dean said as the two left the room.

"Yes. Because God's all about miracles these days," Sam said. "It does seem fairly normal, though."

"Think the douche could have tripped on a gum wrapper?" Dean asked. He bent down to pick one up.

"Possibly. But the cranky one said he wasn't there."

"Let's head back to the motel and check out the pictures," Dean said.

"Oh, wow, you guys work fast." It was Ellie, standing in front of a door at the bottom of the stairs, keys out.

"You eat fast," Dean retorted. She smirked.

"Fair."

"Maybe you and Sammy here could go and get some coffee then, if you aren't too full," Dean said, elbowing his brother in the ribs. Ellie blinked, tilting her head slightly.

"Well, I mean… sure."

"Great!" Dean said, "I'm sure you can show him where the best place to get coffee around here is." Both were watching Sam now.

"Sounds fun," he said with a smile. Ellie shrugged.

"So Ellie, you from around here?" Sam asked. The two sat at a small table in a coffee house attached to the student center. Ellie sipped at her mocha before answering.

"Nah, I'm from out of state - a tiny little town called Burbank. Not California; this place just gave me a really good scholarship, so," she shrugged.

"I went to Stanford on a good scholarship," Sam said, "but I'm originally from Kansas."

"Fancy," Ellie said with a whistle and a smirk. "Did you study photojournalism then?"

"No, I was actually per-law," Sam said. "It wasn't for me."

"Cool," Ellie said. "I'm a philosophy major myself; I've changed it like a billion times though," she sighed, "It's hard when everything is interesting." Sam laughed.

The two sat in silence for a minute or two.

"Dog person or cat person?" Ellie asked.

"Dog person," Sam answered. Ellie grinned.

"Me too, I had a Jack Russell terrier when…" she trailed off, looking confused. She rubbed at her head. "Ugh, never mind, no I didn't have one when I was younger. My Grandmother hated dogs." She looked perplexed.

"When I was younger, we found an old Golden Retriever who I named Bones," Sam offered. Ellie smiled.

"I always wanted a really big dog, like a Newfoundland!" Sam laughed.

"Well I – "

"Ellie!" a figure threw themselves into a chair next to the girl. Ellie jumped.

"Victo- what are you doing here?" The other girl, Victoria, blinked at her,

"Looking for you. Do you have the notes from Theology today?"

"Ask Jack."

"I was looking for Jack, he's hard to find."

"Couldn't you have asked me when I got back to the room?" Ellie asked with a sigh, "I don't carry my notes with me everywhere, you know."

"Sorry," Victoria said, noticing Sam, "are you on a date?"

"Uhh," Ellie started.

"No," Sam answered, "just two people having coffee," both girls gave him a strange look.

"Victoria, this is Sam. Sam, this is my roommate Victoria. Call her anything you want but if you call her Vicky she'll probably smite you."

"Noted," Sam said, raising his eyebrows at the word-choice.

"Sam, huh?" Victoria said with a grin, she leaned forward, "you don't happen to have a brother named Dean, do you?"

"Victoria Oh My God," Ellie hissed, "is this about that stupid book series?"

"You never read them, did you? I thought getting you to return all of them would at least tempt you," Victoria replied in a pouting voice. "Is this about how your uncle Chuck hates them?"

"That's a good enough reason for me," she replied.

"They're good, though! You've read Twilight for crying out loud." At the look received, the other girl hurried to continue, "but they're way better than that."

"Can we talk about this later?" Ellie drawled, rolling her eyes, "I thought you were supposed to be the normal one of the two of us?"

"You're crazy about chocolate and when you're in a sugar rush, I'm crazy about my books. It's like the golden rule."

"Chocolate, huh?" Sam said with a smile.

"Yup, she's crazy about it. I bet you even have some kisses in your jacket pocket, don't you?" Victoria reached over and picked a few pieces of chocolate from Ellie's pocket. The other girl flushed and pushed her off.

"Okay. This has been great, really. Victoria, I have the notes in the room, let's go," she stood and turned back to Sam, "It was nice to hang out with you a bit, Sam." She said with a smile, "give me a call if you have some free time."

The two left through the front door and after a minute or so, Dean came sliding in through the same door.

"That was an awfully short Date, Sammy."

"Shut-up, Dean. Let's go look over the pictures."

The Brothers hovered around Sam's computer screen to look at the results from Sam's random photography. It had just been for the cover, but they figured they may as well check to see if it turned up any clues.

That being said, they had spent over an hour going through the numerous pictures.

"I'm not seeing anything," Sam groaned, rubbing at his eyes, "Wait –" he grabbed the computer and spun it to face him, pressing the arrow key a few times to go back a few pictures.

"What?" Dean asked.

"Ellie has blue eyes," Sam said.

"So what, loverboy?" Dean said. Sam shot him a glare, but spun the laptop to face his brother in answer. He had pulled up the picture he had taken of Ellie at the building hours before.

Her eyes were a light, eerily-familiar, golden-brown color.

"Shit," Dean said, spinning around just in time for Cas to pop in directly in front of him.

"Hello Dean…. Sam," Cas said.

"Hey Cas, can't chat," Sam said. He stood, grabbing his jacket from the chair next to him, "have to go strangle an archangel masquerading as a college student."

"That is why I am here," Cas said. "Ellie Shurley does not realize she is Gabriel's reincarnation."

"Wait, reincarnation?" Dean said, "the dude didn't bite it 20-some years ago, Cas."

"It's… an unusual situation," Cas said.

"Like Anna?" Sam asked. Cas shifted.

"Not… quite. Anna had chosen to fall, and lost her grace. Ellie Shurley still has her grace, it's just been suppressed."

"Who can suppress an archangel's grace?" Dean asked. There was a pause, "Nevermind, God, got it. But why?"

"I am unsure," Cas admitted.

"Wait, did you say _Shurley_?" Sam clarified. He thought back to earlier when her friend had mentioned Ellie's uncle Chuck.

"Of freaking course," Dean exclaimed, rolling his eyes. "It always comes back to the damn prophet, doesn't it."

"So, how do we un-suppress her grace?" Sam asked.

"I believe it is starting already, I was able to trace her presence when you arrived," Cas said.

"But she still has no clue what's going on," Sam said slowly.

"And if you can find her, hypothetically so can other things," Dean said. He rolled his eyes, "Well shit. Now we have to go help out freaking Gabriel." Cas nodded and reached out his arms before Dean could protest.

* * *

><p>Ellie sat alone in her apartment, sitting at a desk that had seen better days. The only lights were around her desk, illuminating the pages of the textbook she was reading. A knock at the door caught her attention and she glanced up.<p>

"It's open!" she called.

There was no response. With a sigh and a roll of her eyes the girl stood. She opened the door.

"Hello-" and then she was tackled to the ground.

She let out a yell as she hit the ground, and pushed up with her feet to shove her attacker off of her. The dark body went flying off, and crashed into the island of the tiny kitchen. Breathing heavily, and eyeing the figure, she stood.

After a few seconds, when the body didn't move, she ran for the still-open door. But then it rose and launched itself at her again. She screamed as she hit the floor, the side of her head bouncing against the hardwood floors.

She struggled, shoving the figure off of her again. This time she got a decent look, it was the cranky kid with the cast from before; her roommate's brother.

"Tony? What the fuck?" she breathed out. Tony, who clearly wasn't himself as he didn't seem to acknowledge his broken arm, lunged again. Prepared this time, Ellie aimed a punch for his throat, and pulled herself up against the island as he recovered. He ran at her again and she grabbed her textbook, which she had sat on the counter before opening the door, and swung it hard. The book caught him off-guard and he was thrown to the floor where he lay unmoving.

That was the scene the Winchesters arrived to - Ellie standing over the fallen figure of the teen, her arms still arched up holding the large book. She noticed them standing there, both with guns drawn.

"What the Hell is going on?" she demanded.

"El-" Sam started to say. Ellie's attention was drawn beyond his shoulder, however, as Cas shifted into view. Her eyes widened and she dropped the book (which fell to the floor with a clatter) to rub at her head.

"Holy shit," she breathed. "Y-you're… you're Castiel."

Cas looked perplexed.

"You… recognize me?"

"I've been having these headaches," she said. She moved back to her desk and opened one of the drawers, grabbing a folder. She brought it back to the counter and opened it, revealing hasty sketches that looked nearly exactly like Castiel. The other three moved closer to inspect them, ignoring the still body. "Victoria said they looked exactly how she pictured Castiel from the leaked manuscripts of Supernatural books."

"Is that enochian?" Sam asked, pointing to scratched-out characters at the bottom of some of the drawings.

"Yes. It's the sigils spelling out Gabriel's name," Cas answered. He held up one of the pictures to inspect it further. "Fascinating."

"Spelling out… Gabriel," Ellie repeated. She looked down at her drawings, her hands tracing over the characters. She let out a hissing breath and clutched at her head. Her eyes had turned back to the golden color they had been in the picture.

"That's… that's why you're here? Oh God."

"You know then?" Dean asked.

"Not until _just now_," she hissed. "Damnit, you morons always ruin everything, don't you?" She glared at them, arms crossed, "I happen to _like_ being human. Damnit, I don't want to 'remember' anything, I want to go back to… damnit." She sighed.

"I apologize, Gabriel, I did not realize that you would not want to be aware," Castiel said after a pause. Ellie looked back up at him and rolled her eyes.

"Oh calm down Castiel. I may not remember much, but I'm positive I've hated your morose puppy-face since you were a fledgeling. Apparently it was going to happen eventually anyway," she sighed, leaning down against the countertop and rubbing at her head.

"I think your powers started coming back without your knowing," Sam said, "that would explain the weird things."

"Wait, like I magic-punched Tate off the roof?" she clarified, an eyebrow raised in a perfect image of Gabriel's trademark.

"More like a trip," Dean offered.

"Geeze," she said, "that makes me feel better. Can someone flip on the lights?" she asked. "You boys can take a look at Tony and I can make some dad-damn brownies or something."

As Dean and Sam tied up the knocked-out boy, Ellie wandered around the kitchen grabbing various things from the kitchen. She started making the batter and handed the bowl to Cas for him to stir.

"How long will it take?" she asks eventually. Cas tilted his head to the side, perfectly calm as he stirred the sugary concoction.

"I am not positive," he said. "You're situation is unique."

"Of course it is," she sighed. She glanced at the bowl, "I think the batter's ready."

A few minutes later, the brownies were in the oven and all four stood in front of the tied-up boy.

"He's not a demon," Cas said.

"No, he's just your average Luciferian," Sam growled. Ellie raised an eyebrow at his tone, and her ears were maybe a bit pink.

"A Satan worshiper, really?" she asked.

"Looks like it," Dean said, nodding to a tattoo that had been hidden underneath the boy's cast. The arm was healed. The tattoo was a familiar symbol of a pitchfork.

"He was probably attempting to obtain your blood to complete a ritual," Cas offered. Ellie paled, and her hand went up to her cheek where she had cut it in the struggle before.

"Shit," she breathed. Cas looked at her.

"I could heal that, if you'd like."

"No," she said, "I guess it'll be fixed up later, huh." Her tone was dry, and she shifted awkwardly. "Last few minutes of being a human, I suppose."

There was a beat, and she turned to Sam.

"Screw it," she muttered. And then she reached up, grabbed his collar, pulled him down and started kissing him. Sam's arms flailed a bit to the side, and then settled on her shoulders as he started kissing back.

"Hey Ellie, why is the door - " Victoria's tone was bright before she wandered through the open door and saw the site; her roommate and best friend making out with some guy while two strange men lurked awkwardly and her brother was knocked out and tied to a chair.

There were just some stares for a beat.

"OH MY GOD YOU'RE CASTIEL!" she shrieked. Cas looked alarmed.

The oven beeped to alert them that the brownies were done.

* * *

><p>Minutes later, Victoria was surprisingly easy to catch up.<p>

"So you're Sam and Dean," she said slowly, "and you're Castiel. And all of that is real?"

"Yes," Dean said with a sigh.

"And my brother…"

"Was attacking Ellie for her blood in an attempt to ritually summon Lucifer." Said Cas. Ellie made a motion as though to elbow him but stopped halfway through, as though remembering that it wouldn't do anything. "It would not work," Cas added.

"Why Ellie though? And why are your eyes…" a blink, "like, gold right now?"

"What?" Ellie asked, "My eyes have changed col- damnit." A sigh.

"How far do the 'internet spoilers' go?" Sam asked.

"Not super far," Victoria said, "I think the latest one was 'The Curious Case of Dean Winchester.' They're just starting to get published again, so they don't want to reveal too much." She stared at Dean with a very judgmental frown, "I can't _believe _you slept with Anna."

"Hey, what the Hell?" Dean asked.

"It clearly hurt Cas' feelings!"

"Look here - "

"She put her hand over the mark, Dean," Victoria said.

"OKAY," Ellie said with a clap, "enough slut shaming of the not-entirely-fictional people now, okay?" Victoria frowned again.

"Okay, but why your blood?"

"Ellie is the reincarnation of the Trickster. Sort of," Sam said. "She didn't know until just now."

Victoria looked doubtful.

"Why would Trickster blood be apart of a Lucifer-summoning ritual? I would think angel blood would be more apt for that."

"Well…"

"But the Trickster, oh my gosh! I totally love the trickster books. I totally shipped the Trickster and Sam; though it's kind of weird that you're not a dude."

"Thanks, Tor, I get that a lot," Ellie said with an eye roll.

"But…" Victoria was back to looking unconvinced. "Seriously though, why the trickster?" she paused, "Is the Trickster -are you - an angel?"  
>"Err…" Ellie stuttered.<p>

"You're name _is_ Gabrielle."

"Really?" Dean said doubtfully, both eyebrows raised.

"I didn't name myself, thanks," Ellie muttered, shooting him a glare.

"But that would make you an archangel," Victoria said, starting to get excited. "Holy shit, did you stop Lucifer yourself?"

"Woah, okay, hold up. What exactly is -"

"No," Cas cut in. "Gabriel attempted to stop Lucifer but ended up dying."

"What?" both Victoria and Ellie exclaimed.

"I _died_?"

"What exactly do you think 'reincarnation' means?" Sam pointed out.

"I'm 22-years-old and was apparently alive and kicking a few years ago as the Trickster, so I'm not sure!" Ellie said back.

"How can you even _kill_ an Archangel?" Victoria said.

"Only an Archangel Blade can," Cas offered.

"My brother _stabbed _me," Ellie said softly. "I can't…"

"Close your eyes," Cas said suddenly. Just to be safe, he reached over and covered Victoria's eyes with his hand as Ellie started to glow. Dean and Sam each took cover, shielding their eyes.

In a matter of seconds, the bright light was gone. Ellie stood in the middle of the room, clutching at her stomach. She fell to the ground breathing heavily.

"Ellie," Victoria breathed out, "Are you okay?"

"I DIED!" Ellie, Gabriel, exclaimed.

"El…" Victoria tried again.

"My big brother stabbed me in the heart," Gabriel continued.

"GABRIEL," Victoria snapped. Gabriel glanced up.

"Tori," she said in a broken voice. Victoria ran over and pulled her friend into a hug.

"It's okay, Ellie, it's okay," she said softly.

"I was going to stab him, though, too," Gabriel muttered into Victoria's shoulder.

"You were going to stop the Apocalypse," Sam said.

"But I _didn't_," Gabriel said, more firm now. She stood, pulling Victoria up as well. "I didn't do shit. I _died_, and you still ended up a vessel, didn't you? You still had to go to _Hell_. I can read it on your soul!" her voice was panicked now, "I didn't do anything!"

"Gabriel Anne Shurley calm the fuck down," Victoria said. "You died, you stood up to _freaking Lucifer_ and you're alive now. Eat a damn brownie."

"Fine," Gabriel grumbled, "but we really have to figure out what to do with your idiot brother. Luciferians are nuts but they don't generally come up with summoning rituals on their own."

"Exactly," Cas agreed. "We're looking for a demon."

"Right on, bro," Gabriel said with a nod. She walked over to the counter and grabbed a brownie, "the question is who would be idiotic enough to trust some frat punk on a mission to snag a fallen archangel?" a contemplative look at the still-out boy as she chomped on her snack.

"Could it be Crowley?" Dean asked.

"Crowley?" Gabriel repeated. "You guys know Crowley? Oh my Dad, I _love_ Crowley!" she laughed.

"Really?" Sam asked, eyebrows raised in a clear bitchface. Gabriel rolled her eyes.

"Oh please. I'm pals with a demon, at least I never had sex with one," Sam flushed.

"That's…"

"Neither here nor there," Gabriel said. "Exactly, and neither is how Crowley and I became bros. Now, there's no way it's him. He's not exactly pro-Lucifer. Didn't he give you guys the Colt?"

"Would he know who is doing this?" Dean asked, sidestepping that. Gabriel frowned at him.

"Sure, let's just ask Crowley," she said, rolling her eyes. "Let's not interrogate the idiot, find out where the base of operations is and storm in and find the demon _ourselves_ let's just ask the King of Crossroads!" her arms flailed through the air dramatically. Victoria giggled.

"Gabriel," Sam started with a sigh. Gabriel rolled her eyes.

"Fine," she muttered. She snapped and disappeared.

"Woah," Victoria breathed, staring at the spot in awe.

A few seconds later Gabriel re-appeared, carrying a large stack of paper and a familiar-looking gold coin.

"Hey!" Dean exclaimed.

"Really you two, letting yourselves get bugged?"

"Again," Cas said. Sam rolled his eyes.

"What's that?" he asked, gesturing to the papers. Gabriel grinned and walked over to Victoria.

"These are the manuscripts for the latest Supernatural books not in print. All the way up to "Swan Song," which made me cry."

"I thought you haven't read them" Victoria asked. Despite the judgment in her voice, she was clearly excited as she took the papers.

"I said I hadn't read the _books_," Gabriel corrected, "which I haven't. I have read the manuscripts though and…" she sighed and turned to Dean. "Dean, I'm sorry."

"What?" was intoned from both Winchesters.

"You heard me," she snapped, flushing. "I should've realized earlier that Gigantor over here wasn't going to learn his lesson."

"Are you actually apologizing for killing me so many times?" Dean clarified.

"And Sam…" Gabriel said, ignoring Dean for the moment, "I'm sorry you had to go through all that." Her gaze was on the ground, "you don't deserve that."

"Group hug," Victoria said in a very loud whisper.

"Now, wait- " Dean starts, looking spooked.

"What the heck," Gabriel says. In moments, the other three are pulled into a hug. Cas and Dean are smushed together and Victoria looks very pleased for being crushed between Sam's ribs and Dean's shoulder.

"Okay, okay, that's great. Can we get back to the Satanists now?" Dean grumbled.

"Fine, joykill," Gabriel said, releasing them. She looked down at the coin still in her hand, and started rubbing it between her thumb and forefinger. It started to glow white.

"Bloody Hell, what are you doing?" Crowley said as he appeared a few feet away.

"Crowley honey!" Gabriel exclaimed.

"Gabriel Darling, is that you?" Crowley replied. They hugged. "A new vessel? This your first new vessel since the dawn time?"

"Something like that," Gabriel replied, waving her hand dismissively. "So we're dealing with some Satanists and we need to find out who's helping them."

"So you're just… asking?" Crowley said.

"I _know_," Gabriel lamented. "So boring. But they've started send peons after me and I don't want my name floating around to Mikey, so…" she shrugged.

"And I do hate Luciferians," Crowley agreed. "But Darling, I am a demon. What do you have to offer?"

"How about the manuscripts?" Victoria suggested. Crowley turned and looked her up and down. She held out the papers, "so you can know exactly what went down then."

" Hey, those things have our thoughts in them!" Sam exclaimed. "I don't want Crowley all in those." Crowley's eyebrows rose in interest and Gabriel smirked - _well played, Sammy. _

"That seems fair," Crowley drawled.

"But in a few days," Victoria said. "I want to read them first."

"I'll see about getting you another set," Gabriel assured her quickly. She seemed to be telling her friend something in her mind, because they shared a look and Victoria nodded.

"Fine," Victoria said with a sigh.

"I promise," Gabriel said.

"Autographed,"

"I'll try," Gabriel said with a smirk. She turned back to Crowley, "So Honey, we got a deal?"

"Just a little one. Don't tell anyone," Crowley said with a sigh.

"My lips are sealed," Gabriel assured him.

"Dealing with angels on silly little things," Crowley muttered to himself. "Don't even have a soul to sell."

"You're an old softie is all," Gabriel said with a smile. They kissed, and Sam's face got all scrunched up at the idea of second-hand kissing Crowley.

"I'll send you the info Darling," Crowley said, going for the door. "Give me a call later, we should catch up. Did you know I'm the King of Hell now?"

"Well, moving up in the dirty world, aren't we?" Gabriel replied, eyebrows raised. "I'll try to schedule it in."

After Crowley left, she turns to Victoria.

"No, you can't come. Sit here and read these," with a snap, a new set of manuscripts flew to the empty desk in the opposite corner. "I'll get them autographed when we get back."

"But - " Victoria started.

"_No_ Tori. It's dangerous, okay?" Gabriel's tone left no room for argument. She turned to the Winchesters and Cas.

"Alright boys, let's roll."

"He got you the location already?" Sam asked.

"He's such a troll, he knew already and it's obvious. They're at the frat house," Gabriel replied.

"Troll?" Dean repeated. He was ignored.

"I bet it's their creepy 'house Dad' guy," Victoria said. She had moved to the desk and picked up one of the books. "He was assigned there, supposedly, after Tate's fall. Timeline fits."

"Good thinking, Tor," Gabriel said with a smile. "Alright then, we're off!"

"Wait!" Victoria called. "What about my brother?"

"Schedule an appointment with the psychiatrist," Gabriel advised. Victoria rolled her eyes and Gabriel snapped her fingers.

They appeared outside the motel the Winchesters were staying at.

"Alright you three, shoo."

"Excuse you?"

"I'm an archangel, you think I can't handle a piddly demon on my own?" Gabriel said, crossing her arms and frowning up at them, "you'll just get in the way."

"Cas is an archangel now too," Dean pointed out. Gabriel's eyebrows shot up.

"Wha - Bro! You got promoted? Holy cow, way to go," she said brightly, patting Cas on the shoulder. He eyed her warily. "Geeze, Dad's been busy."

"Raphael is - "

"Of course he is," Gabriel sighed. "Right then, if he gives you boys any trouble give me a call, Sam has my cell."

"Wait, you're - "

"Okay, I have class in the morning." Gabriel said. "There's still another month to the semester. I'll go home and tell him to knock it off, but I don't really plan on leaving this life anytime soon. I like it here."

"At least let us - "

"Sam. Boys. This is _my home_. This is _my turf_. And they came here for _me._ So _I_ will be handling it. Got that?" and with a quick of the eyebrow and an unnecessarily sassy snap, Gabriel vanished.

Cas was staring at the spot the archangel had stood, looking mystified.

"Well, that wasn't what I was expecting at all," Sam muttered.

"We should talk to Chuck," Dean said. Sam's phone rang.

"It's Chuck," he said after a moment, "he says to appear inside because his neighbors are outside." Dean rolled his eyes.

"Damn prophets," he muttered.

"He says that wasn't very nice," Sam adds as they hang up.

* * *

><p>AN: So there you go, my first contribution to Sabriel week! It's pre-Sabriel! :D  
>I did have a bit more planned out, but I figured it was stupid enough of a plot to get rid of on April Fool's, so... enjoy!<p> 


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